‘I Hate You!’ Ex BFFs Share Why They’re No Longer Best Friends Forever
Anyone who has ever had a best friend knows just how special the experience is. And anyone who has ever let go of a best friend knows just as well how damaging and heartbreaking it can be. Sometimes, the latter is a necessary thing to do, no matter how much you want to avoid it. Best case scenario, the split is a civil one… but many times it isn’t, and some “BBFs” really know how to brutally backstab their buddies!
Could you forgive someone if they stole your significant other out from under your nose… and took your dog, too? What if they ghosted you after a 20-year friendship without any explanation? How would you feel if they ditched you in the middle of a dangerous city and went back to your house to sleep? This may all sound cruel beyond reason, but these tales of woe are far from fictional. These crushed ex-friends shared the reason that their BFFs are no longer a part of their lives!
Thanks For The Heads Up…
We were completely inseparable through middle school and high school. We had even planned to stay best friends with each other through college. She didn’t get into my choice schools so, being an extremely dumb and anxious teenager, I foolishly agreed to attend a second-rate school with her instead… just so she wouldn’t be alone.
Shortly before the start of our freshman year of college, she informed me that she was no longer going to school with me and was instead moving to NYC to live with a guy she met on the internet. She’d known this for months but neglected to tell me until it was too late to do anything about it.
How Could You Blow That Off?
I was best friends with someone for 12 years and we did everything together… that is, everything that she wanted to do. It was always about her life and her schedule, and she never compromised for me. I went to every event she had, even her parents anniversary dinner. One night, around the time my mother had passed away, I was home alone and I asked her to come over because I just really needed a friend. She declined and said she was going to a friend’s house party because she had just broken up with her boyfriend. We haven’t spoken to each other in probably two years since then and I’ve never been happier.
Geez, This Guy Is Cruel
I dated this guy named John. After several years of being with him, I started to realize that I always felt awful about myself, especially whenever we were around his family. Our mutual friends had a saying: “It’s not a trip to John’s house unless you get criticized.” From the clothes I was wearing to how “dirty” my car was, they always found something about me to pick on.
One day we went to go hang out at his house, and out of nowhere, he pounced on my appearance (I was wearing a hat all day so my hair looked a little funky). He then handed me a bag of aluminum cans for me to recycle and said, “You can put towards your house fund.” Clearly, he was making fun of my financial situation, since at the time I had been in deep savings mode.
Honestly, what the heck was this guy was trying to accomplish? I walked out after that and never looked back. Cut out completely.
Way To Ruin Their Confidence
She couldn’t stop smack-talking me to everyone. She had an incredibly low self-esteem when I met her, and so did I. But each step I took towards becoming more confident in myself, she saw as a threat.
I started working out and losing weight. She told everyone that I was trying to look better than her and eventually that turned into, “He stopped going to the gym and just does drugs to stay thin.” I have never done hard drugs in my life and I was attending double sessions at the gym.
One day, I befriended this other girl who was really sweet and nice to me. My girlfriend told everyone that I was only being friendly to the girl to make her jealous.
Then, when I told her I wanted to get a dog, she said I was doing it to taunt her since her new place didn’t allow dogs and mine did (I specifically looked for dog-friendly places).
At some point I tried hanging out with different groups of people; just to be more social and have a bit of distance from her. She accused me of going out to make her feel bad for not having friends… Yet, I would always invite her to come with me! She’d then say that she didn’t like the people I was hanging out with anyway.
She Didn’t See That Coming
She ghosted me after about 20 years of friendship. I foolishly didn’t see it coming and tried for a few months to call and text her. No response. I grieved for a long, long time.
Oh, The Horrors Of Senior Year
She changed completely during our senior year of high school. Before that, we were the exact same person — we loved the same things and got along like sisters. Then she started prepping for her freshman year of college at a southern school, and completely overhauled her life to look “perfect” for the sororities. She started partying, only hanging out with the “cool kids”, refusing to let me tag her in photos, and just became really focused on her appearance. She made it out to seem like she lived her life as an Instagram model. Everything had to look perfect. Eventually, we just stopped talking because I didn’t fit into her new life.
So, This Is Not Right Way To Stand Someone Up
I had a friend who I always hung out with in high school. We were absolute best friends and we did everything together.
After high school, I attended the local college and he went into the workforce. He started to spend more and more time at this local gaming place, Fragz. Almost any time he wasn’t working or he was there playing some video game.
There had been a few occasions that he blew off spending time with me to go to Fragz, but it was no big deal. I understood he had his own hobbies, even if I wasn’t really into it. However, there were a few other times when we made plans with friends, and he’d just “forget.” He would sit for hours in front of the computer screen at Fragz and totally lose track of time. The next day he’d be all apologetic, and we would forgive him.
One day, I got us tickets to a comedian we both liked. He was going to be performing at a local venue. I only just two tickets, so it was just going to be me and him. We made plans to see the performance, and I went to pick him up at his place about an hour before the show. I get to his house, and his family says they haven’t seen him. His sister then says, “He’s probably at Fragz.”
I drive to Fragz and sure enough, he was there. He had grabbed food with other people and it looked as if he had no plans whatsoever to meet up with me. I got so mad. He probably forgot, but it was just so hurtful that we could go from best friends to this. I guess everything just kind of blew up at that point, and his behavior just made me switch off.
The Worst Way To Lose A Friend
She’s the one who stopped putting in the effort to hangout. I was the one who always tried to get us together and she would blow me off almost every time. Finally, I stopped trying and now we don’t talk at all!
That Could Have Been Super Bad
I lost two best friends at the same time. I’ve known them both since early grade school. One time, they came over to my place and I drove us all downtown to go bar hopping. At some point, I got pretty tipsy, so I asked if one of them could drive instead. My buddy grabbed my keys and assured me he’d be good to drive.
Later that night, I had a bad reaction and got sick, so we left the bar we were at. Once we got to my car, I laid down and blacked out. When I woke up, one of my other friends was knocking on my window.
Turns out, they got super tipsy, Ubered back to my place and got their cars. Instead of taking me home, they left me blacked out in the back of my car in the middle of downtown. They literally took an Uber to my home and didn’t take me.
At Least She Got Some Payback…
I THOUGHT she was my best friend. When we first got close, she slowly started to isolate me from others, saying that everyone around her was annoying and that I was the only person in her life who wasn’t. That was nice to hear; at least, at the start…
Things worsened when she got a boyfriend. She would make plans with me, only to cancel last minute. At the same time, when something went wrong in her life, she expected me to be at her side immediately. She would also get jealous whenever I started talking to anyone else.
It got to the point where I would skip class, assignments and even quizzes to tend to her needs. I should have stopped talking to her earlier but it felt like if I didn’t tend to her needs, she’d completely lash out on me, and I’m not one for confrontation. One night, she confessed to me how important I was to her and how she couldn’t live without me. The next night, she tells me to back off.
I finally dropped her out of my life when I realized I started to get super depressed. I dropped 15 pounds in a month and was struggling way too much with my classes.
As If Being The Third Wheel Isn’t Hard Enough
She strung me along as a third wheel in her relationship, and even if I didn’t want to be there, I was always was. When she later broke up with her boyfriend, she basically dumped me too and made new friends. It still hurts.
Man, This Is Just Sad
I stopped talking to my best friend for a few years and it wasn’t what either of us wanted. When I moved to college, I got into one abusive relationship after another. During those years, I stopped talking to all my friends because I was being manipulated and abused. It just totally messed with the mind.
My BFF thought I stopped talking to her because I was angry at her. I didn’t know how to tell her what I was going through.
Time To Have Your Heart Broken
My best friend died. He and his wife were in a motorcycle accident and neither of them made it. When my son was born, I kept putting off introducing him to them because I just kept saying, “We’ll go tomorrow.” They never got to meet him. My son will never meet my best friend and I regret my laziness so much.
You Can’t Say They Didn’t Try
He ghosted me after 15 years of friendship. I went to his house one day to ask if things were okay because I thought that maybe he was going through something. He told me things were fine on his end and that he was just really busy. When I left his house, I told him to text me. He smiled and went back into his house.
He never texted. That was the last time I saw him. We haven’t spoken in over three years.
Darn, Someone Is Jealous
I had a best friend who I really loved and thought of as a sister. Our friendship was great up until I started expressing interest in a man that she introduced me to. She started spreading rumors about me and even told me to my face that I wasn’t good enough for the guy.
I’m not really sure what her issue was. I never thought that she actually had feelings for him. I always felt like she was just threatened that I was getting male attention and she wasn’t. I knew she was deeply insecure about her appearance, so I thought the act was all just a part of her insecurity.
I thought we’d be able to work through it, but her aggression towards me never ended. She wouldn’t even acknowledge her bad behavior. If I tried to talk to her about it, she’d just insist that I was lying to make her look bad. It escalated to a point where she’d send me text messages saying that she did not care about me or my happiness at all. I cut her off right then and there.
Not Going To Be Your Taxi Driver Anymore
A few years ago I saw a Tumblr post that went something like, “Don’t cross the ocean for someone who won’t cross a puddle for you.”
I had a friend who seemed to only reach out to me when she needed a favor. For example, out of kindness, I’d often drive for over an hour to pick her up and take her somewhere she needed to be, just so she wouldn’t have to use the bus. She never repaid me in food or gas ever, even when asked, so eventually, I made myself less available. Most of the time I was actually busy anyway trying to manage two jobs.
As soon as I stopped being her personal taxi, she no longer had a use for me. The last time she reached out was two years later when she wanted me to donate money to her iPad fund.
Oh, Young Love
Essentially he chose his girlfriend of four months over me, despite the fact that I was his best friend for eight years. The last thing I said to him was, “I hope she’s worth it.”
About three months later, I got a voicemail from him while I was asleep. Sounding very tipsy, the only thing he said was, “She wasn’t worth it.”
Then he hung up.
Well, That Was Certainly Blunt
My best friend had a kid and our schedules didn’t match up very often. Although I tried to give her space because she just had a baby, she took it as me not wanting to hang out with her anymore. One day, after three months of trying to reach out to her via text message, she replied saying she didn’t feel like I made any effort anymore, and that anytime I hung out with her it was just to keep up appearances. She topped it all off by saying that she no longer had the energy to maintain our friendship.
Oh My God, This Guy’s A Jerk
I was best friends with this guy since kindergarten.
We were good for several years but he changed when we started high school. I ended up finding out that he was a manipulative and terrible person. He abused his dog, said too many inappropriate jokes and was a fake person overall.
I exposed him in our group chat one day, only for him to play the victim card and make me out to be the bad guy. I wish nothing but the worst for him.
Now That’s Just A Crummy Friend
I came out as a lesbian in my early 20s and my BFF didn’t take it well. She stopped talking to me and eventually I gave up trying to communicate with her. It did break my heart since we’d been very close for a long time, but I was okay with her going her own way if she couldn’t agree with who I was.
This Definitely Happens To Everyone
We just kind of faded out. We had different groups of friends as adults, and as time went on, the once-a-week dinner turned into once-a-year dinners. Eventually, once-a-year turned into not even talking at all.
You Think She’d Return The Support…
We were there through the lowest points in each other’s lives. I watched her struggle as she developed an unknown chronic illness in high school. She watched me struggle as my “friends” and long-term boyfriend abandoned me while my mother was dying. She saw me at my worst and I considered her my family. Even now, if she needed me I would ignore all of my problems to be there for her.
I know her chronic illness caused her to be very depressed at times, but after so many years of being the only one putting effort into our friendship, I had to call it quits. One unfateful day, I had suffered abuse from a family member and had to leave my home. I didn’t know where to go so I went to her place, and her family let me stay on their couch. That same day, she left to be with one of her other friends, despite the fact that I had just gone through something horrible.
From then on, she would exclude me from all sorts of things she did with other people — going to theme parks, the beach, you name it. That was the final sign I needed to know that she just didn’t want to be my friend anymore.
Well, This Is Harsh
She decided that she’d rather date my brother than be friends with me. I never gave her an ultimatum or anything; she just chose to end our friendship. They have been together eight years and are now engaged. Holidays are super awkward.
If They Don’t Love You At Your Worst…
I broke off all contact with my best friend of 22 years after I got into a pretty severe depression. She showed absolutely no sign of caring about my status or condition. I mean, it was like she just expected me to function normally and be as I was before I got sick. After unsuccessfully trying several times to explain to her what I was going through and how it felt, I just had to give up because it just made my condition worse. The weird thing is that I don’t miss her at all. I’m actually glad she is not part of my life anymore.
Welp, That Came Out Of Nowhere
My best friend showed up on my doorstep red-faced in anger out of absolutely nowhere. I was completely dumbfounded, but had to defend myself… so I broke his nose. I immediately helped him stop the bleeding and got him into a taxi. I tried reaching out to him later that day but he ignored all my calls.
Some months later I wrote him a letter asking what had happened. We were such good friends right up until that moment. Turns out, a mutual friend had told him I stole something from him, even though I didn’t. There was also some stuff going on in his personal life, including a death in his family.
He later admitted that he had a psychological meltdown and taken it out on me. Not something a best friend would do.
Let’s Stop The Passive-Aggressive B.S., Yeah?
Every single time we had the slightest issue, she refused to explain what was wrong. Her response would always be, “let’s drop it” or “knock it off,” even though all I tried to do was talk it out.
It came to a point where I had too much going on in my life and I could not, for the sake of my sanity, keep guessing what was wrong. So, for the last time, she said, “Let it go,” and I responded, “Ok then.”
And that was that.
Yeah, They Kinda Take Over Your World
Kids happen to most of us.
I have a fairly close-knit group of friends from high school. A couple of them moved to other states years ago, but we all pretty much stayed in touch. My wife also had a close group of friends that we’d hang out with all the time.
Eventually, we all got married to our wives and husbands and went through the wedding phase unscathed, with everyone still hanging out with each other all the time, BBQs and whatnot.
Then, kids happened. Babies made their way into our parties and BBQs. As time went on, the get-togethers just stopped altogether.
Sure, we still see each other for the kids’ birthday parties and the occasional gatherings, but mostly we live separate lives now.
How Could Anyone Be This Demented?
He was my best friend since kindergarten. The first friend I made in my new town.
In my freshman year of college, I was home for winter break and he was over at my house with another friend. I went upstairs to talk with my parents and left them downstairs in the den. When I came back, I couldn’t find my phone so I went back upstairs again to check. After a couple of minutes, I went back downstairs and noticed it poking out from under the couch. They left pretty soon after that.
Later on, I get a text from my college friend saying, “Hey uh, your girlfriend is pretty but I’m not sure why you sent me a bunch of nude pictures of her… I’m gonna go ahead and assume it was by accident and I’ll just delete them.”
Turns out my “friends” took my phone, found my girlfriend’s nudes and tried to send them to themselves, but ended up sending it to the wrong guy.
I never talked to those other two again.
Oh Man, This Is A Hard Blow
I’ve always been socially anxious. I didn’t have a large group of friends. My ex, on the other hand, was the complete opposite. It was like two sides of a coin. It worked out, though — she brought me out of my shell, and I kept her from getting too crazy. This was the working dynamic for six years, and I guess you could say I was trapped in love with this girl.
After some time, we broke up, and a good friend of mine calls me suggesting we meet up and talk about it. It was odd getting a call from this friend since I’d been noticing him hanging out more frequently with my girlfriend lately. But at that moment, I really just needed someone to talk to about the break-up.
Here I was, expecting to get some comfort when all of a sudden he tells me that he has been seeing my girlfriend for some time now. He claimed they didn’t do anything until a month after the breakup, but there were pictures on his phone of a trip they took to Leavenworth just a few weeks before the break-up…
Yep, That’ll Do It
She moved literally a thousand miles away, got married, bought a house, had a kid and quit her job to stay at home. I was still living a 20-something, yuppie lifestyle in the big city. I went to her wedding and am still very happy for her, but I guess because we stopped having anything in common, we stopped talking too.
Now, This Is Just An Inconvenience
She just woke up one day and decided she didn’t want to live with me anymore. One day, she left with only 20 days notice, even though we still had a year and a half left on our lease. She said she would only pay for half of the fees because I lived there too and it was ultimately my responsibility. She moved out and left me with an empty room, $500 dollars less for rent, and no roommate the week before finals. We will never talk again.
Middle Schoolers Are The Literal Worst
In middle school, I was so unpopular that people picked on him for being friends with me. So he started bullying me harder than anyone else to prove we weren’t friends.
Sometimes, The Friend-Zone Is Too Painful
He was my very best friend. We dated for almost three years, and during that time he helped me discover who I was. We had similar anxieties and senses of humor, and although our interests weren’t completely the same, we loved listening to each other be passionate about them. We broke up after realizing we couldn’t see a future together, but we said we’d still be friends. After taking some time to grieve, we did just that.
But after a while, I realized he still had feelings for me and was hopeful about starting over again. I had already moved on and started seeing someone else. He decided it would be best for him to stop talking with me. I have since moved to the same city as him, and we’ve caught up over dinner a couple times, but there’s a certain sadness he feels that I know I can’t help with.
Things Really Didn’t Get Better, Did They?
She joined an academic fraternity and immediately thought she was better than me. I told her that she wasn’t and that I thought it was stupid that she got hazed to join something. She was offended and all of our mutual friends took her side. I stopped being friends with all of them immediately. She turned out to be a manipulative and controlling person, and I don’t need that in my life.
At Least He Got Out Of There
I was in a group of bullies in high school. We were pretty ruthless and awful. We’d post up in the main thoroughfare after school and just berate anyone who walked by. We said some awful things. I became a Christian my senior year, so I gradually just stopped joining in on the bullying. Eventually, they all got mad and gave me the whole “You’ve changed man” routine. They prank called me for months and talked about me behind my back for quite some time after we all graduated.